Smoke
by Rae chan1
Summary: CHAPTER 3 FINALLY UP! Integra thinks she's discovered a horrible truth, and then it becomes a painful lie. IxA Romance. Please Review!
1. One Little Touch

It's funny, when you think about it. When I was a child, my parents and teachers always told me that smoking was horrible for you, and for a woman, it was almost unheard of. Well, if you take a good look at me now, you'll see that I honestly don't care. I smoke an average of five cigars a day. Too much? Abusive? I think not.

I sat there, that night, with - guess - a cigar propped in my mouth. It's red tip reminded me of blood; the blood of those that were to be eliminated, the blood of my family, my own blood were all on fire in that cigar, and it almost started to scare me.

My boots were propped up on my desk, and one of my arms cradled my tensed neck while the other rested in my lap. A most comfortable position, I must say. 

As I was saying, I was really just spacing in and out of my own world that night, not particularly up to working or doing anything. It must have been the hunt early that morning that made me feel so exhausted without being tired. A few calls came in, and I took messages for myself later, not trusting myself to remember the next morning.

Watching the ribbons of smoke my cigar was making, I wrote my name in the stars… well, the frame of my window. Integra Wingates Hellsing. My father chose my name for me, telling my mother that I would need a strong and supportive name for myself when I was older. He was right, wouldn't you know.

Now I'm the Leader of the Hellsing Organization and all is well. In the meantime, anyway.

I was sitting, relaxing in the moon's rays. On a night like this, it was rare to find peace and solitude. I was lucky to be able to sit, let alone recline and have a smoke.

Suddenly, I felt a familiar energy in the room, one that I had felt for many years. I knew exactly who it was and why they were here.

"Arucard, come."

The night suddenly got a bit cooler, or maybe it was just my imagination. A dark hole voided the floor beside me as he rose through, his bright red coat discarded for a more simple, less eye-attracting black leather one. His defined cheekbones rose out of his sculpted face, his eyes a cool crimson. He stared down at the cigar in my hand, the one dropping ashes into my lap.

Suddenly, he did something I never expected him to do, something so out of his character that I couldn't even bring myself to ask him why he did it.

He whipped his hand to my pants, brushing off the hot ashes in one sweep, concern written all over his face. He looked at me in question as he brushed my pants a few more times.

"Why would you let this happen, master?" His voice was hushed, but the sting in that deep, throaty voice touched me. He wasn't just concerned for me as a master, but as a friend, an equal, perhaps even more.

He realized this suddenly, and with one step, he backed away, almost sadly, back into the darkness of the room.

"I apologize for touching you without order, Sir."

I was speechless. There was nothing I could say.

'I _want_ you to touch me? I've _dreamed_ about you touching me?' No, those were… my mind was filled with the fantasies I was so trying to rid off, but I could not help it. With a grown man following, protecting, obeying your every command and calling you 'Master' every time he saw you, you would have some romantic-hero fantasies, too. But it wasn't just the fantasies, I thought silently. It was having a real vampire near you, not to cause you harm or turn you, but to keep you safe from others like him, and even worse.

The sad thing was, the race that I fought my whole life to kill was…

Was just what I wanted to become.


	2. Love Bite

Dearest readers: A note for all of you. I have written this story out of the deepest regions of myself, mixing in emotions from a real person to an animated idol of mine. Considering Integra is very close in personality to me, I use some of my personality when I write. As for the correct use of Alucard in this fic: I know that Alucard backwards spells Dracula. I've known that since the day I watched the series. But since I am English and sort of lazy, I will use the spelling that I am most familiar with, Arucard. If this bothers you, don't bother reading the story. If you can move on and not criticize, then please continue. Thanks for your patience and consideration.

Two

He turned slowly on his heel from me, stepping deeper into the dark corner of the room. I knew somehow that his words were true, that he was ashamed for his actions. 

But I also felt a sadness. Was he possibly sad because he wanted to touch me, too, and didn't have the courage to tell me?

I really shouldn't be one to talk.

I felt his sadness, his shame, his sorrow. It reflected my own, and at that moment I knew that a pulse went through both of us, making us both realize each other's feelings.

Suddenly, his shadow melted into the corner, and I was left sitting at my desk, my eyes staring into the darkness, wishing that he hadn't gone.

In the darkness of my bedroom, I sat upon the cushions at my window seat, watching outdoors at the lake. Moonbeams reflected off the water, a mirror image of perfection. I knew that one day…one day…I would have to reach that perfection; the precision that would rid the world of those evil bastards that dared to destroy innocent people.

I sighed, worn already from the day I knew was before me. Another tiring sweep of London, another chance for Arucard to do his duty, as well as let me do mine. I could do nothing but thank him from the very bottom of my heart for what he did and continues to do for me, but how could I, besides a place to stay, a warm home, an accepting staff? Was it ever enough to give up one's life to solely do other's dirty work, just to have a place to be able to get away from others that objected?

Too many thoughts circled my brain, rattled it for all it was worth. At four in the morning, it was much to early to be thinking this much. I knew for certain that soon I would have to get up, put on my uniform, and head out the door like I always did.

Stretching my arms to both sides, I yawned widely. A knock rapped on my wooden door, and I acknowledged it as Walter, coming to bring my routine cup of coffee.

"Good morning, Walter. Just set it down over there, and I'll get it when I'm-"

A cold hand cupped the side of my neck, and an unknown sensation crawled up my spine, making my whole body shiver. The hand gently let go, but the fingers remained only a few seconds later, tracing the lines of my veins.

I couldn't breathe. I knew I was strong enough to fight against any vampire, minus Arucard.

What if someone had come into the castle? How did they get past security? And even then, no one could come in my door without the proper keys. And as far as I remembered, the only person with those keys was Walter.

"…Who are you?"

The person shifted hands, to the right side of my neck, and tilted my head gently to the side. Warm breath tingled the cooled skin, and another shiver shot up my spine.

Before the sharp fangs delved into my pale neck, I saw the black hair, the red eyes. I would have cried in betrayal if I hadn't have simply gone limp.

I knew who had done this.

It was. . . Arucard.


	3. Nightmares

A/n: Sorry about the long wait everyone. This summer's been very busy and I've been trying to write as often as I can. Please enjoy this next chapter of Smoke.

PS: THANK YOU ALL OF MY REVIEWERS!! I love you guys! Honestly, you make writing more fun. ^^

-+-

I took a deep breath and opened my eyes, sitting abruptly in bed. The small amount of light that was in the room suddenly disappeared, and small red dots filled my vision quickly, a wave of nausea hitting me square in my abdomen. 

I groped beside me for the lamp light that always rested there, and finally felt the cool metal against my palm. Yanking the chain, the room suddenly filled with a sharp white, blinding me even farther.

After blinking a few times to regain the vision I had lost, I frantically looked around me, pulling the blankets tighter and closer to my body for some sort of delusional protection. Who knows why in a time of distress some think that mere cotton sheets could save your life or even make the monsters go away.

But there were no monsters in my room. In fact, the door was shut and locked, just the way I had left it before I went to sleep. The only thing left unprotected was the open window, but no one could ever dream of getting in there, unless they could fly.

They could…fly.

My glasses instantly found their way into my hands and I put them on hurriedly, not wanting to stay behind a natural curtain of fuzzy visualization. The room, now bright and in clear view, looked smaller, cozier, less haunting.

My tenseness relaxed, the swollen heartbeat calmed to its normal beating, my hands released their tight grip on my childhood sheets.

Maybe the fact that I could now see, this delusional sense that everyone possesses. A wave of serenity filled the air, and I slid back down the wooden bed frame behind me, covering myself with the sheet.

It was only a dream, only a dim-witted dream.

-+-

I saw the blood on my pillowcase the next morning.

It was covered, soaked through and dried, but my neck was much worse.

There were two holes and smaller, fainter teeth marks around them, making a half-crescent around the large vein. Blood had streamed down, making its way around and between my breasts, then making one full stream to fill the small cavern of my bellybutton, only to stop right before the small blonde hairs of my womanhood.

As soon as I had seen, stripping off the small white nightgown I wore, I threw myself into the shower, eagerly scrubbing, rubbing, even tearing skin.

It had to come off, it _had_ to.

__

Blood…on skin…get it off…please, get it off me…I don't want to be dirty, please…get…it…OFF!

My head jerked and hit the side of the shower suddenly, and I reeled back, blinking slowly. It hadn't hurt; I felt nothing from it. But something else crawled up the inside of my abdomen, a small fire that found it's way up… up to my throat, and I cried out, screaming like I had never heard myself do before.

Bloodlust. Fangs protruded from my canines, making me scream more, for the pain was almost unbearable.

I reached out… my hand stretched towards the ceiling… I didn't know what was happening to me, this fire in my fangs and the pounding pulse that throbbed in my head…

~

I wretched myself upwards, opening my eyes wide and gasped for a deep gulp of air.

__

It was all… a dream…


End file.
